I wish I could just disappear!

bird in rain bird in storm“Why?  Why did I have to do this?  I always do what I want instead of what I should and I always get myself into trouble.  You would think I would learn!  I am so cold.

“So silly of me.  How could I have thought I could do it.  I am just a bit of a bird.  Not even a real bird, not like the Great Ones you see flying about.   Ha.. they could handle it I am sure, and probably without even a wince or a bobble.

“When will I learn? My heart aches because I know what I want and where I want to go but I know also I cannot get there.  What must the others think?  I am sure they can see me and they are all twittering amongst themselves about silly Bepa!  Oh the things they must be saying.  Now my heart is more a flutter!  I wish I could just disappear.  I feel dizzy.. oh dear.

“They must know I know it!  They have to!  How could they not?  I mean really, anyone who sees would know right?  I am a coward through and through.  Oh how dreadful I am, how horribly, awfully dreadful.  Ohh ho ho hoooo….  NO!  I mustn’t.  No crying, not for me not for them… never.

“All I need is a moment for the wind to let up then maybe… Or the air to warm then maybe… or my wings to… oh lets face it, I am lost.  What am I doing out here?!  I am not one of the Great Ones!  What am I even here for, there is no use for me I am not at all important.  I have nothing to offer.  I want to go home yet I can’t!  What a grave situation I have gotten myself into.  I will surely die.”

“Shhhhhhh…”

“Who is that?  I don’t see you!  Oh no, I am going mad!  What else could go wrong!

“Shhhhhhhhh Bepa.  Quiet your heart.  You are exactly as I have made you and you are beautiful.  You have a purpose Bepa, one that only you can fulfill and not one of the Great Ones can do what you can do so be still now, lean into Me.  Give me your fears my love.

You must remember that you are never alone Bepa I am always with you and you will not perish because I have your every moment in my hand.”

“Abba, is that really you?  I am so frightened.”

“Yes Bepa it is me.  I have been here the whole time but you would not hear me.  I will never leave you.  Now turn slowly, lift your head and jump into the wind.  I want to take you somewhere only you may go.  Trust your Abba.”

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This was written from an image prompt from Free Write Friday.  The image is the bird above.  To join the writing prompt click the button below and it will take you to Free Write Friday’s page.

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4 thoughts on “I wish I could just disappear!

  1. Oh my! This gave me goosebumps! I love this! I like how it relates to everyone who has ever made a mistake, felt lost and felt as though people were laughing at them…and then you finish with a whisper from God, reminding us that we ARE the Great Ones!

    Beautiful story! Thank you!

    P.s….always better late than never! 😉

  2. Very powerful and full of emotion. We all tend to allow our fears to rule us great ending to see that we should not fear but trust instead. That is a far better place to live life from.

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